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It's been a good few days.

So, it’s been a while since I have done an actual blog.  I posted a goal list a few days ago and I have to say that I have been doing super well with them thus far.  I have been working really hard, harder than I have in the past year over the past week.  That’s not to say that I haven’t had some hiccups along the way, but overall, I can’t complain about the progress that I have been able to manage.  It feels great.

I started Insanity again. I had completely fallen off the boat earlier in July and knew that doing this was going to have to be something I really worked at if I wanted to feel good about myself.  I’ve learned a lot about my body doing this again and really seen how things affect me more so than ever.  When I did Insanity the first time, I did it in the middle of the day or a bit later.  So, if I ate badly or didn’t drink enough the day before I had more than enough time to recoup.  That’s not true now.  If I do something bad the day before, I notice it, because I am doing the workout when I first wake up.

I’m not doing the running I had planned on, and I don’t think that I am going to.  I’m just not enthused to run at all.  I’m enthused to lift weights and to do Insanity.  Sometimes I feel enthused to jump on the bike.  I don’t feel enthused to run though.  I don’t feel like it’s a good path to happiness for me.  So instead of trying to force it, I’m just going to drop it and not feel bad about it.  I’m still getting a ton of workouts in and still really helping my health, so it’s not really such a big deal.  I do need to get on the bike more though, because I know the slow burning workouts are better for my mental health and I just haven’t been doing those really.

Poker has also been going really well.  I’ve put in about 30 hours this week and it’s not even over yet.  That’s pretty awesome for me.  I’m likely going to fall short of this bet I have with Brett, but I am going to do my best to get as close as I can to it.  I’m 13,000 hands into the 90,000 I need to play to have the bet be a wash, if Brett gets in his 30,000 hands.  I have until August 27th, so it’s a pretty tall order.  Even if I fall short, but put in a solid 40 hours a week doing it, I am not going to be too sad.  I would realistically like to up that to 50 hours a week, but I am taking the steps small at this point.

I’ve really narrowed my focuses down a lot.  I have said in the past I needed to do that, but I kept such a wide array of interests that I just didn’t do a good job or really focusing on only 1 or 2 things.  I kept creating excuses to try different things and not focus.  Now, my life is very simple and I really enjoy it.  I’m meditating, reading, writing, playing poker and working out each day.  I’m really not doing anything more than that.  The results of each of those things has far exceeded my expectations even in this little bit of time, and I think a large part of that is because I have little else to distract me.  Even within that group of things I am doing, some of those are more important than others.

My better mindset has also been really good for my marriage.  It’s only been a bit over a week since I have really been focusing on things, but I think that I have been a much better person to be around.  I am not an easy person to get along with sometimes, and when I was as depressed as I was, I am really not a good person to be around.  Sure, things could go belly up at any point and this progress I have made could disappear, but at least I am giving it a try and really putting my heart into it.

I’m still remembering to have fun, and I have a huge date day planned on Sunday with Jess.  I’m hoping to get a ton of work done tomorrow so that I can do the date day without feeling any kind of regret.  It’s not that it would be bad to spend time with her, but I feel like if I haven’t put in the work to deserve the time off, then I will be thinking about what I could be doing instead of spending time with Jess.  I still may even get a few things done that night, but I am not planning on it, that’s for sure.  If it happens, then it happens.

Her and I have begun playing Pokémon GO again.  We might be some of the only people still playing it, but it’s been nice to at least get out a little bit and get some walking in during the night.  It’s been wonderful outside, so the 15-20 minutes we go for a walk, it’s been awesome.  It’s also nice to have something to play that is so simple and doesn’t really make me think or be competitive in any way.  I’ve been playing a lot of League of Legends, but that doesn’t have the same relaxing qualities as Pokémon GO.  Part of our date day is going to be going down to the Plaza before we catch a movie so we can get some Pokémon, because are cool like that.

I think that’s going to be it for now.  This ended up being a bit longer than I thought it was going to be.  I have a few other things I would like to get done before I turn in for the night.  Hopefully will have another big day tomorrow and will keep this positive momentum going!

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